Scarily accurate

So today I was online and I was bored ( as usual ) so out of boredom I decided to check out my horoscope + zodiac sign + birth card predictions. And they were ALL so scarily accurate that it spooks me out (just a lil). Okay I'm gonna paste some of it here and for those of you who knows me, feel free to judge it.

For the combination of my zodiac and horoscope, I'm the Cancer born Monkeys:

Cancer born Monkeys will seduce the socks of any members of the opposite sex who dares cross their path. They are sensitive and free natured, yet have a talent for organization and bossy leadership. Solving problems for others is their strongest suit.

For my Birth Card, I'm the Ace of Spades:

The Ace of Spades is the most spiritual card on the deck, and yet, also the most materialistic. The person usually has a life-long conflict between their material, worldly urges and their deep, past-life spiritual heritage. (Okay the rest of the article is super long and i suppose many of u will find it boring. Therefore, I choose to stop here)

Hey, accurate, isn't it?